When will our “no” be an actual no? A lot of times we give vague signs. We say no, but actually mean yes. When it comes to relationships, we have all been through it and some men have managed to decipher our codes. When we give signs that are contrasting, we cause certain boundaries to be overstepped unwillingly. Who can even take us serious at that point? We say one thing, but do the other…
Let us be honest, in a relationship you don’t always want to be doing certain acts, but you give in for the sake of love. There go your boundaries. And you know I am talking about sex; an act we do with our bodies. This is what the Bible says about our bodies:
“Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit. Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.”
– 1 Corinthians 6:15-20 (KJV)
This Scriptures makes it vividly clear that our body is a temple. We have it, but our purpose is to keep our body as a place of purity and holiness. It is a sacred place. A place kept pure, neat, and holy. No unholy thing should even come near. That is how we are supposed to treat our bodies. With our bodies we need to serve God, so that many can glorify Him. When you look at the Buddhist temples, you see the way they treat such a place. Even those who come near it, come with respect and do not dare to do something which is deemed sacrilege.
But what about us, ladies?
How many times have we read this in the Bible? We love to quote it, yet we do not live it. I can personally testify of that. Many of us ladies have defiled our bodies by not keeping ourselves for that one particular person God has designed us for. I am in the same place.
As ladies, you need to set boundaries. I have had boyfriends and in order to keep them, I would give in. Just because I did not want to lose them. I believe many ladies have done the same. We like to call that love. But no, that is lust. I call lust a temporary feeling and action that can destroy permanently. I might be one of the lucky ones who did not get pregnant and did not contract any disease (because sex can lead to these two consequences). But the feelings I had afterwards were not positive. I knew I had done something I actually did not want to, yet I still proceeded. That is what apostle Paul wrote in the book of Romans 7:19-20 (NIV):
“For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do – this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.”
Let us be able to stand for what we believe. If that person you’re with cannot respect the boundaries you are setting and is pressuring you into acts that are immoral and unholy, my sister, leave that person. It is better to stay single, treating your body as the temple of God, than to be in a relationship and making it a temple of immorality. We were bought which such a high price, so let us value the price paid. Let your “yes” be yes and your “no” be no. It might be my body, but it is His temple.