The character of your future spouse should be one of the top priorities as a young Christian woman. Marriage is an institution ordained by God, in which He joined one man and one woman together so that the two shall be one flesh. His word says in Genesis 1:27 that God created man in His own image; in the image of God he created Him; male and female He created them. As we are created in God’s own image, this means that every quality God has, we also possess in some form. Isn’t that amazing?
Marriage is so much deeper than just an union between man; marriage is a metaphor of Christ and the Church! And, according to Proverbs 18:22, He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favour from the Lord. Sometimes ‘’he’’ can show up with all the right characteristics traits, however, that does not guarantee that he is “the right one” for you. Your husband will most definitely have to pursue you the right way. But this isn’t to say you can’t make the first move. Just remember that the majority of the effort along the road to marriage should be his portion. As women, we should always be praying and reflecting on the word of God when it comes to choosing our life partners. We need to pray for the Spirit of discernment, grace and favour. If your full and complete focus is on God, you allow Him to lead the right man for you to you, and then you won’t end up with just a good man that isn’t actually for you.
Who you eventually end up with can be someone you never would’ve thought of, so it’s good to keep an open mind. Whoever it is going to be, there are some non-negotiable character traits you should pray for and desire in general, which are;
Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices (Colossians, 3:9, NIV) // Therefore, putting away lying, “Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor,” for we are members of one another (Ephesians 4:25, NKJV)
The integrity of the upright will guide them, But the perversity of the unfaithful will destroy them (Proverbs 11:3, NKJV). // Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behaviour in Christ may be ashamed of their slander (1 Peter 3:15-16, NIV).
For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there (James 3:16, NKJV). // No one should seek their own good, but the good of others (1 Corinthians 10:24, NIV).
By humility and the fear of the Lord, are riches and honour and life (Proverbs 22:4, NKJV). // But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6)
The mouths of the righteous utter wisdom, and their tongues speak what is just (Psalms 37:30, NIV) // The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:7).
BUT! Let us not be too focused on their character, but more on our own. As Proverbs 14:1 says that the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands. One thing I truly believe in is that our Biblical knowledge should always connect and reflect on our lifestyles. As young Christian women we should know the Bible in full, and not just the most popular Scriptures! God’s word is open and available for us all we just need to be consistent in prayer and faith. May we build and soak ourselves in His Word and let us remain prayerful when we collectively share this journey to marriage!