There are a lot of meanings and definitions for marriage according to culture, religion and society views. The one we all know is that marriage is a union between two people, specifically a man and a woman. The key word here is two people, not three or more, just two. Let me take you to the beginning in Genesis 2:18 when The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (NIV) And God created Eve for Adam making them man and woman, just two of them..
I wondered why God didn’t create more people than just the two and why he made them suitable for each other. I got my answer; it is easy for two people to be together and agree on certain things, but trying to get more people to agree on things is very difficult. Therefore God, be the all-knowing One, knew marriage should be between two people. In my culture we say that marriage is a long journey for two people, and anybody who is about to embark on a long journey has to prepare themselves. You start by gathering the things you need for the journey and you end up leaving the things you don’t need behind. Marriage, being a journey, requires the 3P’s that are essential for every journey: preparation, planning, and packing.
Now before you enter into marriage you need to be mentally, emotionally, physically and most importantly spiritually prepared. You have to fully prepare yourself for anything that might happen during your journey. You need to know that there will be sad moments, sickness, difficult situations, unexpected events, decision making, commitment, and sacrifice. But by putting your spouse first, there will also be happy, beautiful, amazing, exciting and wonderful moments during this journey. Basically, you need to prepare your mind for anything that might or will come your way. Don’t just look forward to the best part in marriage but be ready to embrace every situation.
Now to the planning stage. Most people spend a lot of time planning the wedding, forgetting that is just a one day occasion. The main adventure begins after the wedding, which can turn into a disaster if it’s not planned well. You see, going on a long journey, you need to sit down and draw out your plans and strategies. You and your spouse need to move forward as a team at all time, nobody can leave the other behind. Before you embark on this journey, the both of you need to outline the steps and stops in your way. You need to discuss things like the number of children you want to have, how to raise them, how to manage finances, how to make time for each other, and everyone’s contribution to the household. There will be a few bumps and potholes on the road but planning and preparing yourselves for it will make things a bit easier. So before you say I do and begin the journey of marriage, take a seat and plan ahead.
The last P is packing. We like to take everything we love with us when we are embarking on a journey, but as mentioned before, some things might not be necessary or there’s simply not enough room for it. The same applies when you are packing for marriage. The things you need to bring with you are love, peace, patience, endurance, care, humbleness, respect, sacrifice and above all submission. More importantly, you need to pack God with you because He is going to be the centre of it all. So it also says in 1 Corinthians 11:3; “but I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of Christ.” (NIV) So no matter what, you need God in your live. While packing for marriage remember to leave pride, selfishness, arrogance and that controlling attitude behind. Give the crown to your husband and make him your king. Doing so and being submissive doesn’t make you a fool, it rather makes you the wise obedient wife God wants you to be.
Remember that submitting to God means submitting to your husband. I hear a lot of people saying but the Bible says whoever finds a wife finds a good thing (Proverbs 18:22). Yes that’s right, but did you also know that the same Bible says in Proverbs 20:6 that most men proclaim everyone his own goodness, but a faithful man who can find? So yes, he is lucky to have you but you are blessed to have him because God made you suitable for each other. So my dear ones remember that this journey ahead of us will require us to take a lot of things with us but we also have to leave things behind.